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Why Do You Need To Know My Childcare Arrangements?

As a stay-at-home mom for the last 12 years, it is obvious that day to day childcare is pretty much my job. However, since diving into entrepreneurship, we’ve had to come up with creative ways to juggle working from home with our decision to forgo daycare. We made a conscious decision years ago to have one of us with the children for as much as possible, which means we’ll do what we need to do when our schedules conflict.

We’ve taken advantage of the hubby’s flexible(ish) schedule & vacation days when I need to be away from home. I’ve utilized restaurants & locations where my oldest could supervise play while I meet with others. And, I now have 4 free hours through preschool for 3 mornings each week.

We handle it. It’s just how it works. When you work, you arrange childcare—family, friends or otherwise. So, why is it, when I choose to attend a daytime event or travel for a conference, I am constantly asked who has the children? Do people walk around asking their coworkers what daycare they use?

No. In fact, no one has ever asked my husband who has the children when he’s at work or traveling. It is just assumed the girls are with their mother. It just doesn’t seem to work the other way. Can’t we just assume that if I am away from home, the children are with their father—or otherwise cared for in a way that I, as their mother, have deemed appropriate?

It is, after all, my job.

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Article by justheather

Heather Sokol is the married mother of many amazing, active children through birth, adoption, and foster care. They have created in her a Sports Mom, Scout Mom, Band Mom, Dance Mom, Allergy Mom & avid coupon clipper. Is that miscellaneous enough for you? She shares her deals & tips at Inexpensively.com and reports progress on learning to be a grownup at JustHeather.com. justheather tagged this post with: , Read 94 articles by

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2 Comments Post a Comment
  1. I think at conference like BlogHer, it’s just a matter of small talk. I doubt that anyone thinks that you left them home alone with piles of chicken nuggets lying around. =} Since it’s a concern for most of us who are normally home with our kids during the day, it seems like an opportunity to commiserate, share ideas and support each other rather than something more negative. Unless, of course, it’s said by someone in THAT TONE…

  2. justheather says:

    You’re probably right about BlogHer. I actually get the question more at events that are male-dominated. It comes across as extremely sexist. Like, I shouldn’t be there with them because someone needs to be home with the kids.

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